I lived in Punjab for four years, and often met people who confused me. One of the ideas sold to me as good Sikhi was that I, as an amritdhari Sikh, should have only little dealings with non-Sikhs, only eat food prepared by amritdhari Sikhs, only visit the houses of amritdhari Sikhs, and so on, and so forth.

A young friend of mine lived with his amritdhari mother and his keshdhari father and sisters. His sisters were not allowed to do any work in the kitchen, as otherwise young Singh Sahib would not touch his food. He did not take food from street vendors and dhabas. Not because the food would be unhealthy (loose motion), but because it was prepared by a Hindu, or any other type of none Sikh.

Another amritdhari friend of mine refused to visit the house of a Christian, as he could not take food in that house, and did not like to offend the Christian by his refusal. He also advised me to live on a diet of grams, taken with me from India, when I went to visit Pakistan, as I could not take food from Musulmaans.

Going by the sakhis, all Gurus, from Guru Nanak to Guru Gobind Singh, mixed with people of all different backgrounds found in the sub-continent. They ate at their houses and received them in their own. Guru Nanak, according to a well known story, preferred the simple food of an honest poor man to that of a dishonest rich fellow but his preference had nothing to do with them being Hindus, Musulmaans or Sikhs. The Reht Maryada does not tell us not to eat food prepared by non-amritdharis.

The argument I heard from the proponents of this culinary apartheid is that we should only be in sadh sangat, the company of the true ones, the holy. This infers that sadh sangat is only to be found amongst amritdhari Sikhs. I think that going by the sakhis, and by Sri Guru Granth Sahib, sadh sangat are the true seekers, and they are not just found amongst amritdhari Sikhs. And not all people who have taken amrit are true seekers.

I am trying to live a full life in the middle of society. I came to west London because I wanted to be part of a sizeable Sikh community. But I refuse to live in a closed community, where I only meet Sikhs.

One of my best experiences recently was in a political meeting, where two Methodists, a Musulmaan and this Sikh agreed that God, Allah, Waheguru was one, and the inspiration for all four of us.

I am a very recognisable Sikh, dressed in blue chola and pajamas, dastar, with an ' beard and a kirpan. Looking different is the easy part, showing Guru's teachings in your behaviour is the real challenge. But when I get that even half right the rewards are wonderful. Because when you live Sikhi, do Sikhi, you will meet sadh sangat of many different backgrounds.

Born Cornelis Heule in 1947 in the Netherlands, Harjinder Singh arrived in Delhi January 9, 1996, in Amritsar about a week later and took amrit on July 14, 1996. During a four year stay in Punjab, Harjinder first did seva in Harmandir Sahib and then spent one and a half years at the Institute of Sikh Studies in Chandigarh.

Since February 2000 Harjinder is in London where he worked with the Sikh Human Rights Group and continues to volunteer for it's affiliate, Gurseva. Active in the United Kingdom's Liberal Democrat party, Harjinder was involved in the party's recent general election campaign.